Finding Your Quest:
A recap of the podcast where I was a guest with Becky Higgins and Becky Proudfit
A few months ago, I was blessed to be a guest on the Cultivate a Good Life podcast with Becky Higgins and Becky Proudfit. These women have created a beautiful and inspiring influence as they have bravely ventured out on their personal quest. “Finding Your Quest” was the topic of our conversation and I want to share some highlights with you.
You have a Purpose
Each one of us has a unique set of skills, experiences, talents, and perceptions. Yet, we all seek our calling, purpose, or as I like to call it—our quest. It is my observation that women everywhere are being called to quests of influence in great number, and the majority of them never expected to be doing what they’re doing.
A quest is not a one-size fits all sort of thing, but is unique to you. Your purpose may be business related, or it may be service-minded. It may be on a large public scale, or just within your home, church, or community. The key is to find out what you are here to do, over and over again, and get after it.
How Can You Find Your Quest?
What if you don’t know what your purpose is? How can you discover it? Those are such core questions to finding fulfillment in our lives. Let me give you a few more questions to consider:
What are you called to right now?
Each stage of life offers new and unique challenges that we need to adapt to and learn to integrate into our purpose. We are put in places and given opportunities to serve. They don’t have to be big and public, but we do need to recognize them. Develop eyes to see the needs around you. As a mother of young children, I found a small quest in working on literacy skills with my first-grade child’s class for the few available minutes I had before my husband left for work. I saw a need, felt nudged to move, and acted on it.
What keeps coming to mind?
A common pattern I’ve observed in talking with those who have found their quest, is that the quest wouldn’t leave them alone. The ideas were relentlessly circling in their minds, or kept them up at night, or just kept coming up in various conversations around them. They felt nudged to act, despite the discomfort.
What do you already have?
When a quest comes calling, one thing I want you to know is that you already have the tools you need to get started. What are your gifts? Talents? Experiences? Education? Interests? Make a list. Naturally, the quest is going to be bigger than you are right now—that’s the challenge isn’t it?
Try, Try, Try
But you don’t have to be perfect, or even totally qualified, in order to begin. Don’t be afraid to try several things out—perhaps the first attempt isn’t the winner, but it will inevitably give you more understanding and more skills in order to take on the second attempt. Tackle the small quests, and let them move you toward the big one. Each step you take is progress towards finding fulfillment in your quest. Learn to trust yourself.
Welcome the Quest Critics
When you begin your quest, it is important to have support. Tell a few trusted people about your vision and plans, and invite them to be there for you. Remember, you’re not asking them for their permission or approval, you’re asking them to cheer you on. Be selective, and respect the sacredness of your quest. Choose those who see something more in you, and see the good things ahead.
And here’s a little head’s up for you. The closer you are to finding your purpose and living it, the more you will draw the attention of both fans, and haters. If you are getting strong feedback, both positive and negative, you’re probably on the right track! Believe your quest is something bigger than the negativity of others.
Roadblocks that Prevent us from Starting
There are also patterns of struggle that I’ve observed. Here are a few things that may attempt to hold you back from embarking on your quest:
Wanting to see the end from the beginning
Of course it is natural to want assurance that your efforts are going to be successful. No one wants to step out of the comfort zone into failure. Nothing will hold you back from your purpose like this will though. Believe there is something better ahead and get out of your own way.
Thoughts of inadequacy or lack of qualifications
Remember, you have what you need to get started! More will come as you begin the journey.
Fear of: failure, disappointment, negative comments from others
The battle of beginning a quest, to a large extent, takes place within our own minds. Our fears can paralyze us and keep us far from first steps of our journey, and consequently, far from the joy and fulfillment of embarking in faith.
Fear of telling others, or saying it out loud
This roadblock may stem from a fear of commitment, or from a fear of comparison due to the perceived judgments from others. There is accountability when others know of our plans, and that may seem like another avenue for failure to happen. This is where your squad comes in! You need quality cheerleaders to help you keep going, brush of the dust, and help you refocus on the good things ahead.
Too many times I hear women share how they feel that they are not being a good mom if they do anything other than being mom. This is simply not true. By evaluating what you are being called to right now, you will find that your quest is a series of smaller quests that change with the seasons of our lives. Create your own space and find fulfillment in all that you do.
You get better at questing the more you say yes. You may not feel qualified at first. Questing requires faith and trust, so let go of the need to know the outcome first, and be courageous!
Let’s Review Quest Basics
- Try different things. Your first attempt may not be the golden ticket. Sometimes it takes time and action to discover your personal quest. Look for what lights you up and kindles a fire in you. Doors will open for you and your energy will be fueled.
- Find a guide/mentor. Look for someone who can help you along the way.
- Take the first step. Make a list. Talk to someone. Gather resources. Open your mouth.
- Just do it. It will be uncomfortable, but oh so satisfying, and you will meet some amazing people along the way.
- God can do amazing things with us when we say “Yes!”